I have discovered something more important to me than happiness: self-respect. Even on a bad day, a day when I am far from being my own biggest fan, my integrity can remain intact. That is the ultimate measure of myself, at the end of a day, and ultimately at the end of my life. It's not about what happens to me; it is always about how I respond.
Donald Trump’s lies – outrageous, right? How dare he say whatever comes to mind without the slightest concern that he just contradicted what he said last month – or yesterday – or five minutes ago?! As a psychotherapist it is my job to challenge the obvious. Or in this case, maybe my job is to point out the obvious.
The tolerance so many people have for the dishonesty of Donald Trump has not just come from nowhere. It is a product of the increasing tolerance we have all had for politicians’ dishonesty across the board. We have lowered the bar of expectation for our elected representatives so extensively that we are like the spouse of an abusive alcoholic. We simply accept the dysfunction and abuse and do our best to pretend it is not as bad as it really is. We no longer insist that our representatives be honest with us. (When was the last time you were shocked to hear a politician lie?) Even when they deny and deny and deny - then semi-admit they had “mis-spoken,” we let them off the hook. We have been worn down to the point where we are complicit in the political immorality, stupidity and deception. At what point do we come to understand that we the people are where this problem starts and we are the only ones who can solve it?
If you do not see yourself as part of the problem,
you will not be part of the solution. Al Anon anyone?
I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!